Transitioning from one home to two comes with necessary, though sometimes difficult and even painful, adjustments for all members of a family. With roughly 50% of U.S. children witnessing the end of their parents’ marriage, learning to co-parent effectively is more important now than ever.
Based on nearly 40 years of combined practice helping children and families transition, here are our Top 10 Tips to Launch Your Successful Co-Parenting Journey in 2023:
- Always take the high road if any disputes or differences arise. It models more effective communication when children experience their parents figuring tough situations out peacefully.
- Remember to share your love with your children while they are in your care. This is their childhood and they depend on you. While smiling and putting on a brave, happy face goes a long way, making sure they understand the depths of your love unconditionally is most important.
- Be flexible. This goes for everyone in the family. Your children will need time to adapt to life in 2 homes, as will you and your ex. Understand that these things take time and grant yourself and your kids a little grace to figure things out.
- Ask for help. Undoubtedly, you and your ex did not come to this decision lightly. The process of divorce, separation, and co-parenting takes time and may also require third-party experts to help you navigate the logistic, monetary, emotional and relational elements of the equation. The good news is that there are mediators, therapists, attorneys, and financial experts who specialize in these situations every day.
- Communicate, communicate, communicate. Make sure co-parenting duties and responsibilities are clearly established with your ex so your kids don’t fall through the cracks. For example, know who is responsible for school pickup and who will be attending your children’s activities and events.
- Don’t pressure your children to choose one parent over the other, especially if you are in a joint custody scenario. Children should be free to express love for both parents, regardless of which household they are in.
- Embrace your new-found freedom. If you have shared custody, there will be times where your home feels deafeningly silent when your children are at their other home. Rekindle the hobbies you haven’t had time for in the past, or take up a new class. This is the bright side of co-parenting, and an opportunity for self-care.
- Keep your kids busy. Engaging your children in their favorite activities and extracurriculars can help ease the transition and remind them that not everything in their world has changed.
- Establish new traditions in your house and around the holidays. There may be things you did not have the freedom or time to do before that can become welcome routines for you and your kids. Think Friday night pizza and holiday cooking decorating for starters!
- Schedule quiet family time. While keeping your children busy and engaged is important, so is being available to them. Time that is strictly reserved for your family can strengthen the bonds of trust, love, and security within your home.
Each new year is an opportunity to start a fresh chapter in the journey of life. If 2023 finds you starting a co-parenting journey, we hope these tips help you and your family get off to the best start! Find more parenting tips by following us on Facebook and Instagram @eisenblackstonegroup.
